Barclay's Premier League '14-'15 discussion V9

Hapless_Hans wrote:Maybe the GL community should spearhead a kickstarter drive to buy, take over and run Newcastle United

immediately appoint Pardew Manager for 10 years to troll Mole

I can manage Newcastle

RealGunner wrote:I can manage Newcastle

okay then Big Sam

Obviously the board will consist of the staff here. With lesser roles being given to posters.

Dani will be DoF, RG and RedO will be co-presidents. BC will be head scout while RWO will be head GK scout(Both will also be part of the board).

I will have no job except to wear a suit and have casual conversations with Roman Abramovich.

i have a french passport , i can be a player at Newcastle   .

RG will make me captain too .

Sold at the passport bit

2 points off relegation, holy moonwalk. If they get relegated it will be because of GL and the "Is Pardew still the worst manager of all time thread", no doubt about it. You guys should feel ashamed.

I am staking a claim on director of operations at newcastle

You guys need diversity so I'll hire myself as head of diversity and give myself a 6 figure yearly Pound Sterling salary for ten years. My 2nd job as Head of Diversity is to let myself go from the job but pay off the remaining years of my ten year contract in one huge lump sum. This may or may not bankrupt GL and/or RG. Possibly just RG.

Then I shall sue Newcastle for wrongful dismissal as I am from the Caribbean and my accent is probably the closest Mole would ever hear someone speak like Bob Marley and settle for an undisclosed fee. It is in the million pound sterling range.

Then proceed to buy Newcastle from the now homeless RG and hire Hala and Futbol as Sporting Director and Chairman respectfully and enjoy the chaos that is about to ensue.

We'll only hire you if you speak French.

Fußball wrote:2 points off relegation, holy moonwalk. If they get relegated it will be because of GL and the "Is Pardew still the worst manager of all time thread", no doubt about it. You guys should feel ashamed.

Thanks for reminding me. That thread is due a bump.

I can be head of Asian operations. Marketing, summer tours, player scouting, satellite clubs, commercial moolahs, etc.

I am academically and professionally qualified in emerging markets strategy, focussing on India, China, Japan and South East Asia.

RG knows how to reach me.

I can see how this is not going to work.

Everyone daydreaming about how to divide all those jobs and titles up without anyone concerning themselves with how to raise the, I don't know, few hundred million needed first

Surely one of our members is loaded

Heard Tom had a trust fund stashed in a swiss bank account. It is thought he has over 44mill stashed in there which we could use it to kickstart our business/club. Of course he has no choice because we could snitch him up to the authorities if he has any problems with our plan. Its up to srigooner to make us enough money to buy Andy Carroll and attract his dad artmorte to be our next youth coach otherwise I am afraid I will be forced to sack him

that's what I was thinking. Give us a rundown of your finances people.

Sri though, that's a useful resume.

Doc wrote:You guys need diversity so I'll hire myself as head of diversity and give myself a 6 figure yearly Pound Sterling salary for ten years. My 2nd job as Head of Diversity is to let myself go from the job but pay off the remaining years of my ten year contract in one huge lump sum. This may or may not bankrupt GL and/or RG. Possibly just RG.

Then I shall sue Newcastle for wrongful dismissal as I am from the Caribbean and my accent is probably the closest Mole would ever hear someone speak like Bob Marley and settle for an undisclosed fee. It is in the million pound sterling range.

Then proceed to buy Newcastle from the now homeless RG and hire Hala and Futbol as Sporting Director and Chairman respectfully and enjoy the chaos that is about to ensue.

halamadrid2 wrote:Heard Tom had a trust fund stashed in a swiss bank account. It is thought he has over 44mill stashed in there which we could use it to kickstart our business/club. Of course he has no choice because we could snitch him up to the authorities if he has any problems with our plan. Its up to srigooner to make us enough money to buy Andy Carroll and attract his dad artmoore to be our next youth coach otherwise I am afraid I will be forced to sack him

brb finding the next Messi with BC.


If every GL member sold one of their kidneys, surely we'd have the dough to go through with this

halamadrid2 wrote:Heard Tom had a trust fund stashed in a swiss bank account. It is thought he has over 44mill stashed in there which we could use it to kickstart our business/club. Of course he has no choice because we could snitch him up to the authorities if he has any problems with our plan. Its up to srigooner to make us enough money to buy Andy Carroll and attract his dad artmoore to be our next youth coach otherwise I am afraid I will be forced to sack him

44m is more than enough to buy cheapcastle, once they get relegated.

Ashley will laugh all the way to the bank, we'll have our club and the Newcastle fans (Tom and Mole) will have competent owners.

halamadrid2 wrote:Its up to srigooner to make us enough money to buy Andy Carroll and attract his dad artmoore to be our next youth coach otherwise I am afraid I will be forced to sack him

I have our backs Hala. Newcastle will be returned to European elite. However, unlike those Blackburn owners, I will not promise a nation full of chicken eating Blackburn fans

Hapless_Hans wrote:that's what I was thinking. Give us a rundown of your finances people.

Sri though, that's a useful resume.

I have been building a career to be the hero GL Toons need

I have also done that MOOC coursera thing on Global Business of Sport.

IMHO we also need investment in a good Ladies team

One which plays on the field of course.

And one for off-field research activities and management team bunga bungas, but we should discuss that in our first board meeting.

Kick wrote:Surely one of our members is loaded

AHA!

Kick admits to being loaded! We have a winner!

Hapless_Hans wrote:I can see how this is not going to work.

Everyone daydreaming about how to divide all those jobs and titles up without anyone concerning themselves with how to raise the, I don't know, few hundred million needed first

Damn it , few weeks ago someone offered me 50% of $128 million...and I blocked her .

Hapless_Hans wrote:that's what I was thinking. Give us a rundown of your finances people.

Sri though, that's a useful resume.

Preferably with bank account numbers, credit card information, and ATM pins, right Hapless?

Harsh words on Newcastle's players from The Telegraph:

Newcastle United terrified of playing in front of home fans as foreign stars warn loved ones to stay away

The news only confirms fears that some Newcastle players would rather go into hiding than fight against Premier League relegation, writes Matt Law

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/newcastle-united/11581962/Newcastle-United-terrified-of-playing-in-front-of-home-fans-as-foreign-stars-warn-loved-ones-to-stay-away.html

iftikhar wrote:

Hapless_Hans wrote:I can see how this is not going to work.

Everyone daydreaming about how to divide all those jobs and titles up without anyone concerning themselves with how to raise the, I don't know, few hundred million needed first

Damn it , few weeks ago someone offered me 50% of $128 million...and I blocked her .

That would have bought us Newcastle as well as funded my Ladies team development projects. And given the management team a first year payout.

Keep your eyes open lads. I am going to head to the lottos this evening. Pretty sure our lads over at the betting threads will also start working on it at the earliest.

I'll be the club mascot.

Also are we seriously renaming club to GL Toon?