The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
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lenear1030
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Great Leader Sprucenuce- Forum Legend
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Not as funny as the England thought process one but still, I lol'd a bit...
Doc- World Class Contributor
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Lol @ "Threaten people with peril if they write them off"
Le Samourai- World Class Contributor
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Doc wrote:Not as funny as the England thought process one but still, I lol'd a bit...
Link to the England thought process?
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Doc- World Class Contributor
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
That map is amazing. Especially Turkey, made me laugh.
aford92- Starlet
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
''did england win? yes. think again. no''
loled at that
loled at that
Grande_Milano- First Team
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Did they play well??? Yes--> Really??? ---> No loool
halamadrid2- Ballon d'Or Contender
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
All three hilarious.
VivaStPauli- Fan Favorite
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Joke is on you. Roberto Martinez is going to be a pundit, I could listen to him tactically analyse a phone book
Zealous- World Class Contributor
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Saw it a while back it's ok.
Magricos- First Team
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Guide for Criticising Roy Hodgon's Squad Selection(football 365):
Captain: if someone who has been captain before, "predictable". If not, "wrong".
Average age of squad over 26: too old, over-reliance on the failed so-called "golden generation".
Average age of squad under 26: inexperienced/ruining our chances for the Olympics (I forget whether we care about this or not).
Goalkeepers:
Joe Hart: obvious choice and deserves no credit.
Rob Green: plays for a championship club. Only selected due to failure to persuade anyone else out of retirement, ergo poor man-management.
Ben Foster: nepotism.
Right back:
Failure to take all of Micah Richards, Glen Johnson, Kyle Walker, Phil Jones and Chris Smalling constitutes a decision, and therefore automatically a risky/wrong one.
Left back:
Ashley Cole: obvious, deserves no credit. If a back-up is selected: unnecessary, waste of a squad place (cf. Stephen Warnock). If not: short-sighted.
Centre back:
Failure to persuade Rio and Terry to play together is poor man-management. Success is "too risky".
Central Midfield:
Gerrard: make reference to Hodgson's time at Liverpool and cast doubt on ability to get a performance out of him.
Lampard: too similar to Gerrard. If not picked, make unflattering AVB comparisons.
Scott Parker: would certainly perform better if 'Arry was manager
Carrick/Barry: boring.
Scholes: if picked, desperate. If not picked, a missed opportunity
Anyone else: an unknown quantity.
Wings:
Joe Cole: if not picked, point out that he has been playing brilliantly in France. If picked, point out that he has been rubbish in France. No-one will bother to check either way.
Ashley Young: if picked, diver that will not fool continental referees, therefore a waste of space. If not picked, point to past goalscoring form and ability to win penalties.
Adam Johnson: if picked, has hardly played for Man City this season. If not picked, has hardly played for Man City this season and would have bought much-needed freshness to the squad.
Walcott: if picked, has only ever performed that one time against Croatia. If not picked, performed that one time against Croatia.
Stewart Downing: if picked, 0 goals 0 assists. If not picked, bemoan lack of natural left-footers in the squad.
Anyone who plays for Swansea: if picked, they play for Swansea, a small club. If not, harshly overlooked.
Strikers:
Rooney: if picked, waste of a squad place. We'll be out after 2 games anyway. If not picked, have "ROO-DICULOUS!!!" headlines on standby.
Andy Carroll: if picked, has been rubbish all season. If not, has been brilliant for the last two games.
Defoe: if picked, has not played all season. If not, gifted finisher, adds freshness to the squad, 'Arry would have picked him.
Crouch: if picked, exposes England's dearth of strikers. If not, think of the wonder-goal.
Sturridge/Welbeck: if picked, inexperienced. If not, robbing the future of English football of valuable tournament experience.
Captain: if someone who has been captain before, "predictable". If not, "wrong".
Average age of squad over 26: too old, over-reliance on the failed so-called "golden generation".
Average age of squad under 26: inexperienced/ruining our chances for the Olympics (I forget whether we care about this or not).
Goalkeepers:
Joe Hart: obvious choice and deserves no credit.
Rob Green: plays for a championship club. Only selected due to failure to persuade anyone else out of retirement, ergo poor man-management.
Ben Foster: nepotism.
Right back:
Failure to take all of Micah Richards, Glen Johnson, Kyle Walker, Phil Jones and Chris Smalling constitutes a decision, and therefore automatically a risky/wrong one.
Left back:
Ashley Cole: obvious, deserves no credit. If a back-up is selected: unnecessary, waste of a squad place (cf. Stephen Warnock). If not: short-sighted.
Centre back:
Failure to persuade Rio and Terry to play together is poor man-management. Success is "too risky".
Central Midfield:
Gerrard: make reference to Hodgson's time at Liverpool and cast doubt on ability to get a performance out of him.
Lampard: too similar to Gerrard. If not picked, make unflattering AVB comparisons.
Scott Parker: would certainly perform better if 'Arry was manager
Carrick/Barry: boring.
Scholes: if picked, desperate. If not picked, a missed opportunity
Anyone else: an unknown quantity.
Wings:
Joe Cole: if not picked, point out that he has been playing brilliantly in France. If picked, point out that he has been rubbish in France. No-one will bother to check either way.
Ashley Young: if picked, diver that will not fool continental referees, therefore a waste of space. If not picked, point to past goalscoring form and ability to win penalties.
Adam Johnson: if picked, has hardly played for Man City this season. If not picked, has hardly played for Man City this season and would have bought much-needed freshness to the squad.
Walcott: if picked, has only ever performed that one time against Croatia. If not picked, performed that one time against Croatia.
Stewart Downing: if picked, 0 goals 0 assists. If not picked, bemoan lack of natural left-footers in the squad.
Anyone who plays for Swansea: if picked, they play for Swansea, a small club. If not, harshly overlooked.
Strikers:
Rooney: if picked, waste of a squad place. We'll be out after 2 games anyway. If not picked, have "ROO-DICULOUS!!!" headlines on standby.
Andy Carroll: if picked, has been rubbish all season. If not, has been brilliant for the last two games.
Defoe: if picked, has not played all season. If not, gifted finisher, adds freshness to the squad, 'Arry would have picked him.
Crouch: if picked, exposes England's dearth of strikers. If not, think of the wonder-goal.
Sturridge/Welbeck: if picked, inexperienced. If not, robbing the future of English football of valuable tournament experience.
Zealous- World Class Contributor
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Zealous wrote:Joke is on you. Roberto Martinez is going to be a pundit, I could listen to him tactically analyse a phone book
Zealous wrote:Guide for Criticising Roy Hodgon's Squad Selection(football 365):
Captain: if someone who has been captain before, "predictable". If not, "wrong".
Average age of squad over 26: too old, over-reliance on the failed so-called "golden generation".
Average age of squad under 26: inexperienced/ruining our chances for the Olympics (I forget whether we care about this or not).
Goalkeepers:
Joe Hart: obvious choice and deserves no credit.
Rob Green: plays for a championship club. Only selected due to failure to persuade anyone else out of retirement, ergo poor man-management.
Ben Foster: nepotism.
Right back:
Failure to take all of Micah Richards, Glen Johnson, Kyle Walker, Phil Jones and Chris Smalling constitutes a decision, and therefore automatically a risky/wrong one.
Left back:
Ashley Cole: obvious, deserves no credit. If a back-up is selected: unnecessary, waste of a squad place (cf. Stephen Warnock). If not: short-sighted.
Centre back:
Failure to persuade Rio and Terry to play together is poor man-management. Success is "too risky".
Central Midfield:
Gerrard: make reference to Hodgson's time at Liverpool and cast doubt on ability to get a performance out of him.
Lampard: too similar to Gerrard. If not picked, make unflattering AVB comparisons.
Scott Parker: would certainly perform better if 'Arry was manager
Carrick/Barry: boring.
Scholes: if picked, desperate. If not picked, a missed opportunity
Anyone else: an unknown quantity.
Wings:
Joe Cole: if not picked, point out that he has been playing brilliantly in France. If picked, point out that he has been rubbish in France. No-one will bother to check either way.
Ashley Young: if picked, diver that will not fool continental referees, therefore a waste of space. If not picked, point to past goalscoring form and ability to win penalties.
Adam Johnson: if picked, has hardly played for Man City this season. If not picked, has hardly played for Man City this season and would have bought much-needed freshness to the squad.
Walcott: if picked, has only ever performed that one time against Croatia. If not picked, performed that one time against Croatia.
Stewart Downing: if picked, 0 goals 0 assists. If not picked, bemoan lack of natural left-footers in the squad.
Anyone who plays for Swansea: if picked, they play for Swansea, a small club. If not, harshly overlooked.
Strikers:
Rooney: if picked, waste of a squad place. We'll be out after 2 games anyway. If not picked, have "ROO-DICULOUS!!!" headlines on standby.
Andy Carroll: if picked, has been rubbish all season. If not, has been brilliant for the last two games.
Defoe: if picked, has not played all season. If not, gifted finisher, adds freshness to the squad, 'Arry would have picked him.
Crouch: if picked, exposes England's dearth of strikers. If not, think of the wonder-goal.
Sturridge/Welbeck: if picked, inexperienced. If not, robbing the future of English football of valuable tournament experience.
donttreadonred- First Team
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
I didn't know that the average TV pundit had a thought process.
Forza- Fan Favorite
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Zealous wrote:Joke is on you. Roberto Martinez is going to be a pundit, I could listen to him tactically analyse a phone book
He was awesome during WC2010
lenear1030- First Team
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Not Scandinavian but lol'd at "Are they Scandinavian?" --> "Yes" --> "Tell us how well-organized they are."
And Roberto Martinez analysis is absolute GOAT
And Roberto Martinez analysis is absolute GOAT
CBarca- NEVER a Mod
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Doc wrote:
Hungary is huuuuuge!!
the artist of this masterpiece
Be/\/ceCALI- First Team
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Be/\/ceCALI wrote:Doc wrote:
Hungary is huuuuuge!!
the artist of this masterpiece
I believe the yellow country where Hungary is written is actually Ukraine and Hungary is the light green country that the arrow points to.
Forza- Fan Favorite
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
:vagi: :vagi: :vagi:
ty
ty
Be/\/ceCALI- First Team
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Turkey-not even really European, dont know how they got into UEFA, probably Capello's fault
Croatia-beat us at the sport we invented, the nerve!
Italy-modern proponents inclue stoke city
Croatia-beat us at the sport we invented, the nerve!
Italy-modern proponents inclue stoke city
fatman123- Fan Favorite
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Roy Hogson is the manager of England???
free_cat- Fan Favorite
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
free_cat wrote:Roy Hogson is the manager of England???
yep, they got rid of that slimy foreginer Capello! he didnt play 4-4-2 and he didnt show emotion on the touchline! he didnt know the English way to play football!
fatman123- Fan Favorite
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
I've got a feeling that a trophy winning foreigner will be coming soon. Either that or the FA will realise that hell is frozen over.fatman123 wrote:free_cat wrote:Roy Hogson is the manager of England???
yep, they got rid of that slimy foreginer Capello! he didnt play 4-4-2 and he didnt show emotion on the touchline! he didnt know the English way to play football!
Forza- Fan Favorite
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Incredible. Capello leaves, and they hire the recent failure of Ray Hogson.
free_cat- Fan Favorite
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Re: The Average TV Pundit Euro 2012 thought process
Name an English coach that hasn't failed recently?
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