Erling Haaland

Tiny dick

He could be a grower.

I bet he was just swimming prior to the photo and what we can observe there is a scientifically proven shrinkage that occurs in relation to the dick area when submerged in cold water

Can't wait until my man @thimmy comes and compare his dick with Mbappe.

I think we can safely pick you as our designated "lying down on a sunbed in swimming trunks, dick size analyst". We are a majority far left forum, after all

It’s hilarious to me that this dude is doing Messi/Ronaldo numbers without ever looking like an all time great

because he's a stone cold killer in front of goal, that's it!
if he continues on this trend by pure statistical merit he will end up as one of the all-time greats, don't worry

Christ, his ruthlessness is unreal!

Haaland’s winning goal.

pic.twitter.com/Ifm6TLJcx1

— ???????? (@Fs_BVB) August 27, 2021

I want this guy, even more than Mbappe. Getting Ronaldo vibes from him

This kid is legit. Never seen a CF as good as him at this age.

This player is the best player in the world at this moment and time. A balon d’or nominations should at least be on the cards this year tbh.

45 goals in 45 games in 19/20, 41 goals in 41 games in 20/21 and 11 goals in 8 games already.

Haaland is so superior to mbappe that I wonder what Madrid are even thinking tbh, I mean, just the sight of him scares me ffs.

As a no 9, I haven’t seen anyone close to him decades. What an inevitability. What a monster.

CL top scorer at 20 and CL best forward at 21 while playing at Dortmund ffs..

I feel like Madrid is going to sign both.

F**k Mbappe. we have Vini. Sign Haaland ffs.

Heartbroken for Cristiano. He thought he could stop his records being broken by just outlasting the turbocharged dwarf.
But then a big Viking turns up out of nowhere to go berserk on all his precious records for the next 15 years

Unfortunately Haaland plays for a small NT side and Dortmund wont be winning anything as long as Bayern is around The awards take into account the trophies won a lot.

I’m not talking about the winner here. Being nominated has nothing to do with your NT tbh.. if you had a ridiculously individually good season and a good build up to the beginning of the season, that should at least get you into top 3. My pick is Messi, haaland, and lewandowski.. any other thing is wrong, maybe aside kante.

I don’t remember any player having more than a goal a game at the top flight at the beginning of their careers, not even R9 or Van basten even. This is just Mad ffs

BarcaLearning wrote:Unfortunately Haaland plays for a small NT side and Dortmund wont be winning anything as long as Bayern is around The awards take into account the trophies won a lot.

There's a really easy fix for this conundrum

Haaland is a direct descendant of the Vikings, with the blood of Odin and Frigg running through his veins.

One of Madrid's nicknames is Los Vikingos.

Make of this information what you will.

It still makes me laugh

Kind of silly that he can jump this high, when he's already got a height advantage in most situations.

Cristiano Ronaldo in disguise?

Another fine leap and header from Erling Haaland. That area of his game definitely isn’t a weakness anymore!#BVBSGF pic.twitter.com/mhYuSgWdBB

— Sacha Pisani (@Sachk0) December 15, 2021

it says the account is suspended and you cant view the tweet

Wow, they acted fast in taking that one down Copyright issues, I imagine.

Myesyats wrote:it says the account is suspended and you cant view the tweet

4:42. His tendency to lack timing and composure when approaching aerial balls was a shortcoming up until this season, but he's been ruthlessly effective at it since the season started.



I don't know if he's just showing off, but he's had some stupidly high jumps all over the pitch this season.

"The uploader has not made this video available in your country"

feels like i'm being targeted

It's probably blocked here, as well. That's why it's convenient to have a VPN We're learning how to create our own VPNs in our programming course these days, so I might not even have to pay for it next year

The video is just a headed goal he scored against the team that's currently placed bottom in the league. Dortmund actually struggled against them lol. He's been showing some impressive jumping height this season, which might just be a result of having a lot of stamina after being sidelined with injury for a relatively long period of time.