El Clasico Rap Battle thread

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Post by The Messiah Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:45 am

I started this rap thing.....

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Post by The Verminator Fri Apr 20, 2012 2:22 am

El Clasico, the biggest match in all of europe
It's amazing to think how these two teams developed.

But on Saturday night there can only be one winner
Real Madrid to edge it out in what will be a thriller

They think Xavi will run this game, are they insane?
Since he turned 32 he ain't never been the same

Cristiano Ronaldo. Remember the name
The man will rid Barce of their glory and fame.

This the real world. Homie Barce's done
Give up chumps. Real already won.

And remind me, when they try to have Messi enlisted
If Ronaldo wasn't the greatest then i must've missed it.



I liked the one i did on Arsenal vs Man U alot better tbh...


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Post by Scuderio Fri Apr 20, 2012 2:34 am

Lol paperbackwriter is GOD
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Post by Milan31 Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:05 am

First off, fuk Barca
and the leagues you claim
Madrid when we ride
come equipped with game
You claim to be players
but all you do is dive
we bust on cheaters
Mou blasts you for life
Pep tryin to see me weak
his heart I'll rip
Xavi and Iniesta
some weak ass b*tches
...



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Post by Sushi Master Fri Apr 20, 2012 5:52 am

Oh no, here we go again
I prefer a bullet straight to the brain
Liga pansies, an old novelty
Game after game it's the same old casualty

More diving than the Chinese Olympics
Dat pimp midget, the pain he inflicts
Don't get me started on the pretty boy
Big game coming, tears deploy
That's right you, fake Ronaldo
In reality just some asshole

Those big white ballerinas
No chance against the homie from Argentina
Only good thing from that Blaugrana team
So frakking boring they make you scream
Just look at that wannabe Busquets
Dives more than a bomber jet

Supposedly are the best hood in football
Only requirement: max 5 feet tall
Tiki taka, a mental fracas
Like getting screwed in the ass, by an ass
Pray during midgame: can you please frack up a pass?

All Spanish final? Hold your fucyking horses
Writing off 2 mighty forces, like you were Moses
But we come from the best league in the world!
Bow down, son, you just made me hurl
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Post by Aensensen Fri Apr 20, 2012 10:57 am

Sushi Master wrote:All Spanish final? Hold your fucyking horses
Writing off 2 mighty forces, like you were Moses
But we come from the best league in the world!
Bow down, son, you just made me hurl
What a Face
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Post by M99 Fri Apr 20, 2012 11:11 am

The Prophecy by Pep the Philosopher

Tonight's the night we seal the league
Gyeahh, Tiki Taka on the loud mouthed bitch
Yo Vagi, remember to pass the the ball to Puyi 500 times
And be humble and respectful to the white shirted pussies all the times
Cause I can't remember the last time they beat us, Mou the damn fool
Dani, dont forget the pitch is your swimmin pool
And Busi, you've been training with the dolphins for a week
Now it's time to put your ass on the pitch and play hide and seek
Now you boys, put on your helmets, you gotta deal with Epep
Meanwhile I'm gonna go give a call to the ref

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Post by Zealous Fri Apr 20, 2012 11:28 am

:bow:
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Post by vivabarca38 Fri Apr 20, 2012 11:40 am

Oh Cristiano they say you're rich,talented and good lookin'
But what yo gonna receive on Saturday night is an ass kickin'
And Mou they say you're the Special One
But actually you're the Special Five
But after Saturday Night Pep wont make ya feel Alive
They say the only way yo can beat us is with thug tactics
But actually yo gotta go play some Gymnastics
They say we have Messi but you have Mr.Noodles
But after Saturday night he's gonna feel like a doodle
....
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Post by Seppuku Fri Apr 20, 2012 12:09 pm

My name is Sergio, like a Biscuit I am flaky
Theatrics is my motto, got more awards than Kevin Spacey
Can’t defend, can’t attack, but some say I got skills
Diving so much started forming fish gills
Mono, mucho morro, it’s all the damn same
I am on the pitch to do everything but play a football game
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Post by guest7 Fri Apr 20, 2012 12:30 pm

When is Brady2Moss gonna post his rap Sad
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Post by urbaNRoots Fri Apr 20, 2012 12:34 pm

Jose Mourinho - CampMou (Diss Guardiola/Farcelona)

Brace yourself for the main event
Y'all impatiently waiting
It's like an AIDS test, what's the results?
Not positive, who's the best? Messi, Ronaldo and Pele
Ain't no best, La Liga, EPL, Serie A, flossed out, greedy
I embrace y'all with napalm
Blows up, no guts, left chest, face gone
How could Ronaldo be garbage?
Semi-autos at your cartilage
Burner at the side of your dome, come outta my throne
I got this, locked since '9-1
I am the truest, name a manager that I ain't influenced
Gave y'all chapters but now I keep my eyes on the Judas
With Hawaiian Sophie fame, kept my name in his music

Check it
Hook:
(I) F**k with your soul like ether
(Will) Teach you the king you know you
(Not) Mourinho's son across the belly
(Lose) I prove you lost already

Guardiola diss Mourinho/Real Madrid

Y'all ni**as deal with emotions like bitches
What's sad is I love you 'cause you're my brother
You traded your soul for riches
My child, I've watched you grow up to be famous
And now I smile like a proud dad, watching his only son that made it
You seem to be only concerned with sucking Ronaldo's
Were you abused as a child, scared to smile, they called you ugly?
Well life is hard, hug me, don't reject me
Or make fans to disrespect me, blatent or indirectly
In '98 you were getting chased through your building
Calling my crib and I ain't even give you my numbers
All I did was gave you a style for you to run with
Smiling in my face, glad to break bread with the god
Wearing Jaz chains, no tecs, no cash, no cars
No jail bars Jigga, no pies, no case
Just Hawaiian shirts, hanging with little Chase
You a fan, a phony, a fake, a pussy, a Mourinho
I still whip your ass, you forty-six in a karate class
You Tae-bo hoe, tryna' work it out, you tryna' get brolic?
Ask me if I'm tryna' kick knowledge
Nah, I'm tryna' kick the sh*t you need to learn though
That ether, that sh*t that make your soul burn slow
yo
King Alfonso died of AIDS, that was the end of his chapter
And that's the guy y'all chose to name your football club after?
And, Bayern murdered you on your own sh*t
You a di*k-riding fa**ot, you love the attention
Queens ni**as run you ni**as, ask Russell Simmons
Ha, RM get gunned up and clapped quick
Your whole damn football club gunned up and clapped quick
Jose Mourinho to The Special One, damn you on Jaz di*k
So little shorty's getting gunned up and clapped quick
How much of my tikitaka come out you formations?
Wanted to be on every last one of my classics
You pop sh*t, apologize, ni**a, just ask Kiss
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Post by Zealous Fri Apr 20, 2012 12:39 pm

Se7en wrote:When is Brady2Moss gonna post his rap Sad

Soon.
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Post by the xcx Fri Apr 20, 2012 12:41 pm

Z has a hidden talent :bow:
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Post by urbaNRoots Fri Apr 20, 2012 12:44 pm

Ronaldo - Messi diss

I've been fu*ked over, left for dead, dissed and forgotten
Luck ran out, they hoped that I'd be gone, stiff and rotten
Y'all just pi*s on me, sh*t on me, spit on my grave (uh)
Talk about me, laugh behind my back but in my face
Y'all some "well wishers," friendly acting, envy hiding snakes
With your hands out for my money, man, how much can I take?
When these streets keep calling, heard it when I was sleep
That this Missi and Barcelona wanted beef
Started cocking up my weapon, slowly loading up this ammo
To explode it on a camel, and his soldiers, I can handle
This for GOAT and it's manuscript, just sound stupid
When Pele already made a video-tape called "My 1000 goals"
First, Pele's ya man, then you got the nerve to say that you better than him
Di*k sucking lips, why not you let the late, great veteran live
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Post by che Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:08 pm

one more iteration of this boring ass game
it's getting increasingly tiring and lame
plastics round the world rejoice at the sight
everyone else up for another shameful night
diving, acting, occasional assault
rest of the world grinds down to a halt

why? did football really sink this low?
douchebags in the spotlight, this is as far as we go?
ratfaced divers, self-tanned queens,
hide 'n seek champs, diving genes
same bullshit all the time, might as well watch static
at least we'll appease the midget demographic
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Post by free_cat Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:09 pm


Oi, 11 players, 7 millions souls.

You thought you got it!
you thought you won it!
but 10 points was not enough,
to forget about our clash!

So, madridismo bring on all you've got,
millionarie players, media power and referees,
You'll find us ready and we won't back up,
and you'll end up appealing to your history!

Get ready for some ass rapery,
Cause we are playing for a country,
while you are just dirty Madrid.

Get ready for some ass rapery,
Because we are more than a club
and have Xavi Iniesta and Messi!

Lean forward! (Casillas) Lean forward! (Cristiano) Lean forward! (Mourinho)

Prepare yourselves.





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Post by beatrixasdfghjk. Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:15 pm

7 million souls?

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Post by free_cat Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:16 pm

beatrixasdfghjk. wrote:7 million souls?

7 milion catalans.
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Post by Ali Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:30 pm

Brace yourself for the biggest game yet,
Y'all impatiently waiting
It's like a fame test, what's the results?
bad actors, who's the best? United, Real, And BM,
Ain't no best, England, Spain, Germany, Italy, different games, no thrones,
Stoke City embraces us with long throws,
How could Mourinho be garbage?
Trophies thrown at your cartilage
Burner at the side of your dome, come outta my throne,
I'v had this locked since, 55, I AM THE TRUEST.
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Post by paperbackwriter Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:33 pm

Scuderio wrote:Lol paperbackwriter is GOD

Embarassed
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Post by Zealous Fri Apr 20, 2012 1:39 pm

7 million? That's Florentino's pocket change
You like talking about asses bro I find that a little strange
10 to 1 but it'll still count for nothing.
"Mes que un club" you compensating for something?

You schoolboys gotta learn about the birds and the bees
Do you really want to talk about the referees?
Bwinning, we're pumped like a gas station
You're yellow, just like Qatar foundation.


Last edited by Zealous on Fri Apr 20, 2012 4:33 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post by The Franchise Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:23 pm

If your going to steal Ether, dont butcher it like that man lol



(Etoo talking)

("madrid cabron saluda al campeon")
What's up whiteys, ay yo, I know you ain't talking 'bout us dog
You?
("madrid cabron saluda al campeon")
You been on our dick nigga, you envy our style, nigga
("madrid cabron saluda al campeon")


[Chorus]
(We) *bleep* with your team like ether
(Will) Teach you the king you know you
(Not) "Visca Catalunya," across the belly
(Lose) I prove you lost already

Brace yourself for the main event
Y'all impatiently waiting
It's like an AIDS test, what's the results?
Not positive, who's the best? Messi, Xavi and Ini
We da best, East, West, North, South, flossed out, greedy
I embrace y'all with napalm
Blows up, no guts, left chest, face gone
How could Barca be garbage?
Cruyff turn tears Pepe's cartilage
Tiki-taka make you dizzy, chasing it like a frisbee
We got this, locked since '7-3
He is the truest, name a team we havent influenced
Gave y'all chapters but now I keep my eyes on the Judas
With Hawaiian Sophie fame, kept my name in his music
Check it

[Chorus x2]



We were cheated, robbed, stolen from with no penalties awarded
Offside, diving, fouling, you winning this league cause you bought it
You and R.F.E.F, shit on us, spit on our grave (uh)
Talk about us, laugh behind our back but in our face
Y'all some "well wishers," friendly acting, envy having snakes
Their hands out for your money, man, how much did it take?
When these streets keep calling, heard it when we was sleep
That this Gaynaldo and Los Fagengues wanted beef
Pulling up on the shorts, pulling down on the shirt
lace up the boots, lames it gonna hurt
This translator and his tactics, just seem stupid
When Helenio Herrera already played Catenaccio
First, Robson's ya man, then you got the nerve to say that you better than him
Dick sucking lips, why not you let the late, great veteran live



[Chorus]

Y'all cowards cry about Barca' bitches
What's sad is noone loves you 'cause you snitches
Fans of your team knows it traded it soul for riches
You weak, your toughest blow barely itches
Franco probably smiling like proud dad, watching his only son that made it
You seem to be only concerned with dissing Barca
We cheating and you still playin, looking to be the martyr?
Well life is harsh, hug me, don't reject me
Mourinho statement to disrespect me, blatent or indirectly
In '06 you was getting chased through your league
Signing Baptista and Luxeumbergo and we was lifting the trophy
Ronaldinho hit you up for 3, could of been 6
Smiling in our face, glad to shake hands with gods
Standing ovations, no boo's, no whistles, no barbs
Ramos 1st of many rapes, no lube, no rubber
Just horse size dick, hanging balls like giant grapes
You a fan, a phony, a fake, a pussy, a Stan
We still whip your ass, you forthy-nine in a karate class
You Tae-bo hoe, call yourself special, you tryna' get brolic?
Ask me if I'm tryna' kick knowledge
Nah, I'm tryna' kick the shit you need to learn though
That ether, that shit that make your team burn slow
Hoaring yourself out in Samsung ad's like cheap hooker
And hey, whats with your wife, she aint much of a looker
Santiago Bernabeu was a facist, yall ignore that chapter
But still that the guy y'all chose to name your stadium after?
Put it together, we rock hoes, y'all rock fellas
And now y'all try to take our spot, fellas?
Euro and La Liga champs, put you in a tough spot, fellas
Knocked you out 1 comp, soon to be 2, fellas
Hipsters got you hot 'cause you kept your face in their puss
What you think, you getting fans now 'cause of your looks?
Ne-gro please
You no defence having, with Marcelo the rat
Compared to Alves the whole line is wack
And you sold Makele and made Graveson take the role-hey
You went from Hierro to Campo with Helguera, to Pavon, how gritty
And, Atletico give us more trouble than you in your own city
Crissy a dick-riding *censored*, he love the attention
Catalan niggas run you niggas, ask Joan Laporta
Ha, Real-Ma-Drid get gunned up and clapped quick
The Special 5 get gunned up and clapped quick
Your whole damn club gunned up and clapped quick
Translator to Special one, damn you on Herrera dick
So little shorty's getting gunned up and clapped quick
How much of Herrera tactics gonna come out your fat lips?
Wanted to be in every last one of my classics
Yo pop should apologize, nigga, just ask Kiss
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Post by Great Leader Sprucenuce Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:39 pm

Ether :bow: i should post the song that was used as my inspiration although i didnt convert the whole song with El Clasico lyrics.....



Wondering if i should convert the whole song hmm
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Post by matpol Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:39 pm

Franchise :bow:

You went from Hierro to Campo with Helguera, to Pavon, how gritty
And, Atletico give us more trouble than you in your own city

This is the best fragment after first reading.
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Post by aleumdance Fri Apr 20, 2012 3:45 pm

wow, and i thought I was the only Goallegalist that listened to rap.

Goallegacy :bow:
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